Corn Syrup Rx

So how about doctors 'prescribing' someone to give their kid corn syrup? Are you for real, yo? Yes, I'm for real. It's sad that we don't educate ourselves enough to do better for ourselves. I include myself in this because I know I've made some pretty crummy health decisions based on bad or very little (or zero) information. People, just because it's derived from 'corn,' it doesn't mean it's good for us.

Not good.

On another note, I haven't made cookies this week...but I think it's only because we're out of town. I had already made plans to make German choc cake. It's one of Nathan's faves, and it was gonna be for his birthday. It's a good thing we left then because I'm sure I would've wanted to eat most of it.

Earlier I thought about several things that were bothering me that I needed to blog about just to blog, but now I can't think of them. Maybe that's a good thing.

About that...

I love it that I can always feel at home at my brother's house. It's a given that most of the time most people will feel at home at the parent's house, but I love it that I can feel that way with my brother as well. What I don't assume, however, is that I can make myself at home anywhere and everywhere. Now, it's true that if you visit my place or wherever, people want you to feel comfortable and 'at home.' That's the reason we tell people, "Make yourself at home." I mean that completely and very sincerely if I tell you that. AND if you tell ME to make myself at home, I will probably do just that. HOWEVER, I won't be presumptuous about it and just walk in your front door without knocking. I won't just open your fridge and yank things out. And I won't act like I live there or even practically live there without sharing some of the responsibility of caring for your kids, helping you cook, or do some chores. I find that selfish, totally inconsiderate, and completely rude. It's one thing for me to make myself at home with you; it's quite another to take advantage of you. And please forgive me for the times I've done this.

Yes, My Son is Perfect

Tonight I remembered yet again why it is that I don't join 'mommy' groups. Most of them are just a bunch of mothers comparing and competing their kids and doing the one-up thing. I'm just not into that. I'd rather hang out with cool people, thanks.

And Sponge Bob? Please remind me not to let my kids watch this.

I'm sipping some amazing Youthberry White Tea. Yummm. The stuff is supposed to be great as far as anti-oxidants are concerned. It's great warm, and I think I'll try some iced tomorrow.

I should go to bed. Xander is still waking up every 3 hours or so, and if he poops in the middle of the night during nursing, and if he has a blow-out (which happens all too often these days), and if that blow-out gets on everything, then it calls for being up extra long. The other night it was a good 2 hour nursing session. And he insists on his 7 a.m. wake up. His internal clock works too much like mine...or like mine used to.

But I wanted to post some pics for the family since I said I would.

When we had perfect weather sometime last week, we spent an afternoon just hanging at the park...a park in Richie Rich's neighborhood, where you see blond little girls and their Mexican nannies. Where 47-year old mothers tell you about how they're sending their daughters to elite universities and also send them $2000/month as an allowance. Lol. They're for real, yo.


Then Xander had a 'play-date' with Josiah.

I promise my son isn't stuck up. He just likes to push away sometimes.

And Xander likes to take off his socks and suck on his big toe. And I mean suck...like he thinks he'll get milky way out of it. This was on Nathan's bday at the zoo this week.


This, friends, is one of his favorite toys. The sonaja from his abuelito in Mexico. And his friend, Josiah, liked it too. He kept taking it from him. lol. I should learn to make these and sell 'em.

Yes, We Did

We wore green today to be just like everyone else. That's really not why. Xander started the day in all blue so that we could try to avoid him being confused for a girl again. Then we had some kind of leak in his Fuzzibunz, so I changed him to green and blue, and then I was just matching. Have I mentioned that I love Texas weather at this time of year? Love. It. We spent most of the day outdoors and going here and there. Xander inherited his momma's need to be on the go.



He's so peaceful when we're outdoors.

As Time Goes By

Wow - today marks 8 years for us. Eight years. Eight crazy years. All well worth it.

Thank you, Jesus, for a husband who has stood by my side through all my nonsense. Thank you for a husband who loves us and takes care of us. Thank you, most importantly, for a husband who loves You and desires Your will above all other things. I feel like You made him just for me. Thanks, Jesus.

And thank you, Nathan, for being you. I'm glad you're my husband and that I get to walk life alongside you.

Now That I've Found You...

I've been meaning to do this.

For a long time I've struggled with how to write, how to think, how to pray. A while back I got jacked up, people. I did...and I think I'm still recovering. It shouldn't take this long. I pride myself on getting through things, getting over things, walking things out, moving on. I pride myself on being practical. I am, however, an over-analytical person, and this is something I've had to analyze to death, beat it over the head and then leave alone.

And now it's time to move past it.

Summary: while my mom was going through chemo and radiation treatments to treat her stage 3 colorectal cancer, I got messed up. The more we prayed and the more people who were praying, the worse she got. She would have one setback after another. The first few months I did ok. I stayed close to Jesus, relying on Him to strengthen me through it. He was gracious. Then I got mad. It just seemed like we had no break. One thing would go wrong, then another, then another. What can you expect with poisons wreaking havoc? But anyway, I came to a point I had never, ever in my life come to - I gave up. I stopped believing that God cared. Now you gotta know that it had to take a lot for me to come to that because I'm a believer that God will give out the 'good' as well as the 'bad.' I'm a firm believer in His sovereignty. I believe completely that if He didn't make it happen, he can allow it to happen. (By the way, whatever your theology is on this, I don't care to argue it on my blog so don't start cause I'll delete it.) I believe that the things He allows, He allows through His hands, His fingers for a reason, and ultimately it's for His glory. Because of my belief, I've always accepted the 'good' and the 'bad' because I had the understanding that it would always work out for HIS good. And it did.

But this...this was new territory, and I could see no good in watching my mom in as much physical pain as she was in...time after time, day after day. I couldn't see the good in all of the hospitalizations. You gotta understand, her case wasn't the norm. They've got some of these treatments down to a science. But if it could go wrong, it did with her. She was the exception to every rule. So anyway, seeing what I did and experiencing it was pretty heavy duty. I know it may sound lame, but I just couldn't take it. My focus and trust had shifted.

I got angry. And when people would ask what I was learning and blah blah, I would give them a very superficial answer. It was good. Real good. But it was only what they wanted to hear.

I think finally I've been able to quit analyzing the situation and let go of all that nonsense. Little by little. Maybe there's still junk there from it, but at least I'm moving forward. I don't wanna be that way. I can't. A good friend said it like this - how can you walk away from something that has become such a part of you? At the sake of sounding shallow, I think that's a good place to start.

Not a Girly-Man

So apparently I can't even dress my XMan in gender neutral colors without him being confused for a girl. We get it probably once a week - "What a pretty girl..." "Boy, he's a boy," is my typical response. Usually with a thank you. I tell you, dressed in all blue, all boy clothes, he gets that. Today he was in brown and gray and still got it, though those can be gender neutral. But still. Poor kid.

At the Park

Have I mentioned how much my kid loves being outside. If he starts to get whiny, we do 1 of 2 things - 1)'walk' him (hold him by his arms as he runs his little legs all over the place, and I do mean ALL OVER THE PLACE; or 2)take him outside. If we do #1, he gets this huge smile on his face and shrieks with excitement. Then he starts running, and now he sticks his tongue out as he does it. Cute-NESS! If we do #2, he gets totally quiet as he stares up at the trees, the shrubs and just stuff. Either way, it's not that difficult to make him happy. He just likes to move. So this was us at the park this past weekend. He loved the swing and started fussing when I took him out. Wha????


So I then moved onto a swing with him, where he totally chillaxed and started falling asleep.


So I nursed the child, put him in the other swing, and he got that stare he gets when he's about to go out. He was trying to find a place on the swing to lay his head back. Where do I get one of these?


The great thing is that this park is right across the street from my mom's place. We'll be spending lots of time there this summer. More on that to come.

About That

You know, I used to be really OCD about stuff. About life. About cleanliness. About everything. Got married and calmed down. Then as life happened I learned to calm down more because I realized that I was stressing out the people around me. I'm sure that I still have OCD tendencies and probably always will, but I've really chilled out. It's a good thing. Lately I can't even be around OCD people. That's kind of a problem. See, they stress me out now because I feel like I have to measure up to their OCD standards or whatever. Although I try to say that they have a problem and need to chill out, I'm the one with the problem. Pride, insecurity. The problem is with my insecurity. If I was really comfortable in my own skin, I wouldn't care about trying to measure up to anyone's standards. I thought I was over all that. Comes back to bite me. But I've also realized that as I focus more on doing what I'm supposed to be doing - loving and serving my family and friends - that dies down. Hmmm...

BecAUSE we Are Crazies

So yesterday morning I had this great plan of how I was going to put Xander down for a nap, go to the grocery store and then take him for a quick zoo visit. Of course our best plans just never work out the way we plan...especially when you lock the bathroom door from the outside with the shower going. Huh? Yes, the door got locked while the shower was going. And then when I tried to shove, I mean very carefully (how do you do that thing where you cross out words? For the life of me, I can't do it anymore with blogger. grrr) the screw driver in there to unlock it, I knocked part of the doorknob off...the part from the inside...leaving me outside with a jiggly handle and still, no gettin' inside. Oh, and the shower is still going.

I don't know how it happened. The only door we lock is the front door. But it happened. And I really needed to shower. I smelled like funk I'm sure. And all my stuff was in there. Yes, we have a second full bathroom, but it still didn't fix the locked door problem. Thank you, maintenance people, for coming to our rescue.

Anyway, it wasn't all a huge deal, but I almost made it one. I really just had this plan in mind and was ticked that the day wasn't going my way. I wanted someone to blame, and I immediately started with Nathan, "Well, why in the world would you shut the door completely...???? blah blah blah..." Then I stopped. He was being so cool with the whole thing rather than being annoyed like me. He was so calm and collected. For the first time in who-knows-how-long, I made the decision to stop the nonsense I was pulling right then and there and make the most of the day anyway. I used to be a pro at that. Then something happened a few years ago, and my attitude began to stink. A lot. All the time. And it hasn't been cool. More on that soon too come.

But moving on. I didn't make it to the grocery store yesterday morning, nor did I make it to the zoo. I did, however, call an old friend/mentor/honorary Nini to my son and had a nice little lunch with her. I won't always be able to do this kind of stuff. Seasons change. More kiddos come. People move. I move. All those fun things. So I decided then and there to just live in the now. Enjoy the now. And love the now. And I did.

Nothing too extraordinary. But it was good.

You Can Dance, You Can Jive

I don't know. That just came to mind when I was indulging, I mean enjoying a bowl of...



I gotta stop.

A Walk In the Clouds...I mean the Park

I know I post a lot of pictures of Xander in his walker, but his excitement when he's in the thing cracks me up. He doesn't walk in the thing; he RUNS and loves every minute of it.



Happiness


Thank you, Jesus, for weather that allows us to go outside without a million layers and blankets. And thank you for this bebe boys who stuffs his head in his hat to fall asleep.

Simplicity

You know, we tend to make life pretty complicated. That and then it can kinda get complicated on us with all kinds of drama. A friend said this the other day.

"Hope, faith and love. If I do nothing else but love deeply and selflessly, it would be a life well lived."

Really, it's that simple. I think Jesus people have complicated spirituality way too much with big words, conventions, and theories. There's always some new movement or theory when really there is 'nothing new under the sun.' There's talk of leadership, vision, passion, and all those other words that are fine in and of themselves. But really all of those things are just fluff. And we use all those kinds of ideas to sometimes make us feel like we're going somewhere, doing something. We have this NEED to be significant. There's nothing wrong with that.

But what about the simplicity of living a simple life? Yes, doing things extraordinarily because of Jesus. But doing them out of love for Him and love for people. THAT makes life significant and extraordinary. Not fancy theories. The fluffies are sometimes necessary because those make the world go round. They bring the drama that causes us to HAVE TO love people in spite of them and us. But really, let's just leave it at that - to love deeply and selflessly.

Save Me

I got into couponing years ago, but I drifted away little by little. In my attempt to restart, I realized exactly why I fell off that bandwagon. I love saving money, and I love getting great deals. I love it when I can tell Nathan, "I saved $___!" Or "I found Xander great onesies for $1." The problem with couponing is that most of the coupons are for processed foods and items we don't use in our home. As better we ate, the less coupons I found to fit the foods we were eating. I can use a few of the coupons here and there, and I'll do what I can with the ones I find; however, they don't make coupons for carrots, celery, or spinach. I take that back. There actually was a coupon for spinach in yesterday's paper :0 But that's rare. Most of the coupons are for canned this or that, boxed cereals and toxic chemicals. We don't use that stuff. Sure, we'll have a box (or 4) of Corn Flakes here and there to satisfy my midnight cravings, but we just don't make it a habit to eat a lot of processed foods. So when will they come up with coupons for fresh food?