Speaking of motherhood...I know people mean well. I really do. I need encouragement just like everyone else, but the statement, "You're such a good mom," makes me cringe a lot every single time I hear it, especially when it's connected to something extracurricular we do for our kids. This statement sets up a standard that neither I nor anyone else can keep for longer than 13 seconds. I can have my greatest victory as a mom and then feel like a complete failure only moments later.
We are hippie types. I do weird stuff like birth babies at home, breastfeed them until they're 2, we eat weird stuff a lot, cloth diaper, make our own baby food, hardly consume processed food, and basically live a holistic lifestyle. But none of that qualifies me to be a good mom. What if I dropped all of it? Would I then be a bad mom? What about people who don't do any of that stuff? Are they bad moms and parents?
What about when our kids do super amazing stuff or show super amazing character and want to give all their stuff and money away to the kids in Africa? We say it all the time - "Great job, parents!" I get it. We want to feel like we're not doing everything wrong and totally ruining our kids. But since when do we have the power to move in their hearts to be giving, selfless and lovers of Jesus? The last time I read, Philippians says that it is GOD who works in us to WILL and act according to His good pleasure and purpose. Yes, He uses our parenting sometimes. Yes, He uses our example other time, but not one single person can change the condition of the human heart, which is evil and wicked and selfish at best. Somehow we've come to believe that their salvation is up to us and that if we do this or miss that their opportunity at salvation is ruined. Gah, that's stressful and heretical actually :). I'm so thankful our Savior doesn't depend on me for my children's salvation; salvation is of the Lord. Period.
Elyse Fitzpatrick states it so clearly, "He is the perfect Parent and this record of perfection has been transferred to you, if you have put your trust in Him." HE is the perfect Father, and I can trust in His grace to enable me to humbly train my children to live for His purposes.
