I'm on a roll tonight, but I have to be when I have the time...and lots of thoughts. I just don't always share my thoughts. Tonight, though...
...I'm a little sobered. While my mom was going through cancer treatments back in 2008, my childhood best friend's mom, Theresa, was diagnosed with breast cancer and began treatments as well. We were all so happy and celebrated with her and the family when she finished her treatments. All seemed to be going so well...and it's back. With a vengeance. And it makes me so super angry.
Rachel (my friend and Theresa's daughter...who also married a cousin of mine...so she's like my cousin now) sent me a text this morning with the news, and I was immediately heartbroken. Of course, I went through the whole spill with Nathan "...it's so unfair...it really sucks...I just don't understand...I'm so sad...it makes me mad...etc.." The human emotion of it all. It's just dumb. It's nonsense. It makes me mad that we have to deal with this on earth. I do understand that we live in a fallen world, blah blah. But it makes me mad anyway.
Someone said that it's not time for sympathy but for prayer. Although I agree with the prayer part, I guess I can't help but empathize. I think that's what causes us to pray. To hope. To ask Jesus for His grace through this.
Theresa was beginning some natural treatments a couple of weeks ago, but I'm not sure what they'll do now. The cancer isn't just in her lymph nodes, but it has also spread to her lungs and her bones. That's all I know. No idea what the docs want to do.
This is just what's on my mind. As I explained above, their family is like family...not just because my cousin married Theresa's daughter, but through my teenage years, Rachel (again, Theresa's daughter) was my best friend. I spent lots and lots of time with the family, and she married my cousin, Albert, whose dad gave me away at my wedding. Confused much? I know. It makes sense in my head, though this post is all over the place. Just lots on my mind.
Thank you, Jesus, that you are in control and care for us in a way that we can't even comprehend. You have the whole world and little us all in Your hands. Thank you for holding us in the palm of your hand. Though we can't understand the what's and the why's, we trust you. Help us see You in all things.
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