"How did I get myself in this situation?" Ever wonder? I've had a number of conversations with friends during the past few months that have had a very similar tone - how did I get here? 

We find ourselves in the middle of a great big mess - sin usually, and we have no clue how to turn back to Jesus. It's been ages since we've really communed with Him, and we have no idea where or how to start again. 

This didn't happen overnight. It didn't even happen when we made that final decision to just give in. It all started when something didn't go our way, when we got hurt or a prayer didn't get answered the right way, and we became offended with God. It was subtle, it was a little thing...or maybe not. Maybe it was a really big deal and instead of bringing it to the feet of Jesus, we allowed bitterness to take root within our hearts. Then little decisions here and there steered us away from Him. Because something didn't go our way. 

I guess I ask now - since when was this walk about us? Since when was my life about me and my comfort, health, healing, marriage, happiness? Since when was God obligated to make things work out for me and my benefit? Oh, we read Jeremiah 29:11 and Romans 8:28 and think it means God will work things out for our happiness, but that's not it. God's plan, purpose and future for us is not to benefit us but for HIS glory, HIS name, HIS sake. Amazingly, those plans do bring us joy, fulfillment and all those lovely fuzzies, but it's not always hype, it's not always mountain tops, and it's not always hi-ho. 

Who are we anyway? In our culture of superstars, super heroes and celebrities, we somehow think God owes us our 5 minutes. But we're not that important, ya'll. Don't get me wrong, yes, we are the apple of God's eye, He sent His Son to die a gruesome death for us...but somehow we think He owes it to us to make life what we think it should be, and we fall of the wagon when things get a little slippery, boring, hurtful, hard. 

A friend of mine said this: Everything in me wants to pray that my children would live peaceful, happy lives and be spared from pain, but it is more beneficial for me to pray that they would live lives that glorify God no matter what circumstances they face, and that their joy would be found in Him alone.

Yes, and yes. And my prayer is that we be parents that exemplify that for/to them. May my joy and purpose be found in Him, not what He can do for me, where he can take me or how He can use me but in Him.