Update 2/17/08

So during the week we stay in Houston at an RV park that's about 1o minutes away from MD Anderson. I've been meaning to take pictures, but last week was pretty hectic. I'll do that soon. I think I've mentioned it before, but in case I haven't, most of the people staying at the park are also there for treatment at the hospital. It's amazing that this little place is right in the middle of Houston. It's definitely been a blessing to us as my mom's house is actually over an hour away from the hospital.


(Mom and me on Valentine's Day)

If my mom has been feeling well enough during the weekends, she wants to come HOME. We're grateful for the convenience of the RV Park, but there's just no place like home. My mom is used to open spaces, and even though the RV we're using is decent sized (not huge, but not tiny), she feels cramped and chlostrophobic by the end of the week. We came home on Friday after her last treatment and doctors' appointments and will head back tomorrow morning since her treatments are later in the day tomorrow.

Today she wasn't as tired as she was yesterday, but I have a feeling she will be by the time the night is over. She's been working on 'work' stuff, and I'm pretty sure it wears her down. The thing about my mom is that she doesn't know how not to work. She can't just sit still. I can't remember a time when she could just sit and enjoy a movie. She'd grab something to do or would end up falling asleep. She is, however, trying to be wise about how much to do. She understands that there's more stress on her now with all that's happening with her sister. She's trying to make sure she takes care of herself because she knows that's what she needs to do. My mom is the helper of her family. Well, there are others, but my mom was the one who was there when anyone needed anything. By anyone and anything I really mean that. She's used to jumping and doing when there's a crisis. At this point she knows she can't do anything for her sister or anyone else unless she's well herself.

As for my aunt, she's doing okay. There seems to be a problem with her vision in her left eye, but we believe she'll be out of ICU as early as tonight. The family is thinking about having her transfered to Houston because there are family members here who can all help care for her and help with their little girl. We're all hoping that can take place soon.

Update 2/16/08

This past week was definitely a roller-coaster. Healthwise - my mom experienced some side effects from her treatments, but overall we're thankful that it wasn't worse. She's about 1/3 of the way into it, and THAT'S awesome news. That means she's COMPLETED 1/3 of this phase. Her energy declined and her nausea increased as the week went along, and her comfort level was just up and down. I think news of my aunt's health definitely took a toll on my mom, but even THAT could've been worse. My mom just knew that she really needed to 'deal' with the situation rather than allowing the stress of it make her sick. Stress and any kind of virus or sickness will only slow the progress of her treatments.

Speaking of my aunt (her name is Estrella by the way, which means star in Spanish)...well, it turns out that she had a major stroke, and it's a COMPLETE miracle that she's still with us. The stroke caused some brain damage, wich in turn is causing paralysis in her left arm and her left leg. She has, however, been able to move her left toes. She is still heavily sedated, but the doctors did remove oxygen (so she is breathing on her own), and they also removed her feeding tube. Because she's still been sedated, she's been pretty out of it. She has spoken with the family who is there and even over the phone with my mom for a brief moment. We don't think she's aware of how she got to the hospital. There was quite a bit of trauma, and the matter is more delicate and complicated than I can explain at the time, but I do ask that you say a prayer for her as you pray for my mom.

Please pray for:
My mom's nausea and stomach to stay settled, especially during these stressful days.
My mom's energy level.
My mom's appetite - she gained 1 lb last week, but lost it at the end with all the crazyness. She HAS to eat and does because she can't do her treatments otherwise, but she's NEVER hungry. She's tiny as it is so losing weight is NOT an option.
Yes, we know to expect reactions to the treatments. I mean, all kinds of poisons going into anyone's body will wreak havoc. We know to expect the nausea, diarrhea, etc.; HOWEVER, we also know that God has already been gracious in subsiding some of the side effects, and we want that to continue.
Please also pray for my aunt, Estrella, and her health. I will update on her as much as I am able to do so.

Update 2/14/08

This has been one very long and crazy day. We were woken up around midnight last night by the phone. One of my uncles (my mom's brother) was calling to let us know that one of my aunts (my mom's older sister) had been life flighted to the hospital.

To make a very long story and a very long day short, my aunt had a couple of strokes and some injuries due to the strokes (we believe), and she was undergoing surgery all night long as well as earlier today. The surgeries were successful, but the doctors are still finding damage to her body, and...well, we're all trying to wrap our minds around some of the details leading up to it all. She's under heavy sedation, and they don't intend on waking her for a day or two still. There's a lot we're still trying to figure out right now. In the meantime, we're all concerned about her husband and their little girl, who we call Sweet Pea. Little Sweet Pea is 10 years old, and I'm sure so very confused about her mommy being as sick as she is and all of it happening so quickly and the way it did.

Upon hearing the news, my mom wanted to take off and be by her sister's side, but of course, that's out of the question right now. Fortunately, other family members are on their way to help. We don't know many details, but we do know that God spared the life of my aunt at this time for she could've had worse damage than what she already has. Things could've been much worse.

My mom hardly slept last night, and I was just concerned that the added stress would really aggravate her already weak stomach. She did have more nausea and stomach pain today, but she's doing better at this hour.

We (my mom & I) had some really sobering conversations today. Well, they were sobering, but they were really great. I learned a lot more about my family, my history, etc. I've always admired my mom for all of the sacrifices she made for me and my brother (and so many other people). I've always known she was a fighter. More than ever I am grateful for a mother who has faught so hard against so many odds for her family. I've said it before - she's one of the most selfless people I know. She resembles Jesus and His love more than anyone I know. Is she perfect? No (to me she almost is, though). Only Jesus is perfect. He's done a great work of grace in Her life, and I'm glad to be able to witness it. It wasn't that my mom spoke highly of herself during our conversations; it was that she humbly admitted her weaknesses and spoke so well and highly of others. She doesn't talk about love and forgiveness but humbly lives it.

Mom Update 2/13/08

Yesterday was a good day. Last weekend wasn't the greatest for my mom, but the past couple of days have been better. THANK GOD! My mom is in fact experiencing side effects from the treatments, but they could be worse, and for that we're all so very thankful.

It never ceases to amaze me how incredible my mother is. We were at the hospital yesterday (since she has daily treatments, we're there at least once a day), and there was a girl probably about my age or a bit younger. We had seen her earlier in a different area with a lady who appeared to be her mom, but the girl was alone this time. We were sitting in the radiation waiting area...the girl was sitting facing us a few chairs down. All of a sudden she gets up, throws her magazine and phone on the floor, and jets to the bathroom to vomit. I felt awful that her mom wasn't there and just wanted to go hug her, but it was a single person bathroom AND I didn't know how she would take it. I mean, some people like to deal with things on their own and don't want other people, especially srangers, to interfere. Of course, my mom's heart really went out to her as well, so she just got up, knocked on the bathroom door, and just helped the girl.

I was so relieved when my mom did that. I know if I was going through something like that and didn't have my mom with me...I don't know what I would do actually. *sigh* It turns out this young lady's treatments began one day before my mom's, but the side effects are really getting to her. The reason her mom wasn't around was because she went to the pharmacy to pick up some nausea medicine.

I don't do well at the hospital. I try to be normal and not let it show, but my heart just breaks because every single day I see these people who are walking through some pretty horrific ordeals. Every single day that they wake up, they have to face this terrible disease and wonder what reactions from the disease or treatments their bodies will have to deal with...either this day, this hour, or this moment. They are very brave people.

My mom is a very brave woman. I hear her thank God throughout the day because she knows her symptoms from chemo and radiation could be worse. God has been good to us. Yes, she's dealing with some physical side effects (nausea, diarrhea, headaches, weird appetite or none at all, light-headedness, etc.), but she says that things could be worse, and she praises God for his grace to endure whatever comes her way.

When I saw some of the cancer patients at the hospital yesterday, I really started praying that my mom wouldn't get this or that or the other. Is that selfish? I felt very selfish, but I just don't want her body to experience all of that.

As we sat down to eat dinner last night, my mom prayed, "Thank you, Lord, for another good day. Thank you that my body is still doing so well, but please help ____ and ____ who aren't. Help those people who aren't..."

It's a reminder to me not only to pray for my mom, but also for the other people around who aren't doing the best. She also reminds me not to forget to thank Him for His goodness. Yes, He has been good, and is good, and He will give us all the grace to endure what may be.

Mom Udpate 2/10/08

I flew into Houston today, and it was SOOOO good to see my mom! She wasn't feeling the best today, but she certainly didn't let it keep her down. After visiting with family for a little while, we grabbed a bite to eat and are now getting ready for bed.

I'm certainly glad that she doesn't have treatments on the weekends because it gives her body a little bit of time to recuperate before resuming on Mondays.

That's it for now.

Update 2/8/08

I hate that I've been awful with updates about my mom, but unfortunately, circumstances beyond my immediate control have prevented me from doing so.

My mom started treatments last Thursday, January 31. Fortunately it was only for 2 days, and then the weekend, during which she has breaks. This week has been up and down for her.

I was planning on going to Texas on Feb 17, but that has changed, and I will now head down there this Sunday, Feb 10.

More to come...

Update 1/25/08

My mom was released from the hospital on Sunday, Jan 19. She returned on Wednesday for the results and treatment analysis.

The treatments will begin on January 30. That day she'll meet with the chemo team, and that afternoon they will begin the chemo/radiation combination treatments. She'll have 28 consecutive days of treatment except for Saturdays and Sundays. She'll have to stay in Houston close to the hospital so that the docs can monitor the side effects and 'reactions' to the treatments.

She'll be staying in a friend's motor home in a nice RV park close to the hospital. It's way more cost effective than hotel or the MD Anderson housing.

Here's an excerpt from an email my mom sent out: "...with everything that has happened in the last weeks all we can say is that we thank God that He has been so good to us! He has open the doors in the place that He wants us to be, and we know that we are in His hands and that everything that happens to us is for good..."

I'm so thankful for a mom that has the big picture in mind. Sometimes things may not look 'good' on the outside looking in, but we know for certain that God has our best in mind. We may not think it's the best, but only He knows the why's of the what's.

2nd update - 1/19/08

My mom is still in the hospital this morning. Her potassium was very low so they hooked her up to several bags. They should be allowing her to go home sometime today.

Update - 1/19/08

My mom spent all day at the hospital on Wednesday, and she was exhausted. She then had to return on Thursday afternoon and Friday morning for more. They ran an extra test yesterday, an ultrasound that would tell how deep into the lining (wall) of the colon the tumor spread.

I didn't get a chance to talk to my mom yesterday after all of it because she was still "under" when I called. Louis (her husband) let me know they'd call on their way home. The call I received was not what I expected to hear. She had to be rushed back to the emergency room because she didn't take well to whatever they did to her. She was very sick, and they had to hook up an i.v.

This is what they do know - the tumor did go through the wall of her colon and got to some lymph nodes. That means they'll have to do chemo and/or radiation before the surgery to remove the 4 inches. I don't know yet when they'll begin this process.

When they do the surgery, she'll have to go in 3 days beforehand to do all the prep. The surgery itself will take 4-6 hours, and she'll have to stay in the hospital for a week. Then she'll have to stay in Houston as close to the hospital as possible in case something should happen.

If they can save her rectum, she'll have a temporary "bag" for about 6 weeks. If not, she'll have a permanent one.

I haven't heard from her this morning to know how she's doing, but I'll update as soon as I know something.

Thank you for your prayers.

Gotta Love 'Em

I don't know many people who enjoy them - tests that is. My mom is pretty tired of them, and I'm tired of them for her, but I know they're for the best...I think. So her new specialist at MD Anderson (the Cancer Center of Texas and one of the nation's best cancer treatment centers) will be running further tests on my mom this coming Wednesday, January 16 and also Friday, January 18. She'll be there all day on the 16th and for a few hours on the 18th. Not only will they run some of the tests that they've already completed (they like to have 2), but they'll have additional examinations to...do something...whatever it is doctors do.

Then on January 23 the oncology team will meet with her to give her the date of the surgery and instructions on further treatment, etc.

That's all we know for now.

It's great to have a mom with a sense of humor during these "ugh" times. She was telling me that she asked God that if He decided to heal her supernaturally to also please take away old scars from previous surgeries, stretch marks, wrinkles, etc. Isn't she cute?

Thanks again for your prayers. We appreciate you.

My Mom

I wasn't sure what to title this blog because as I begin to write it, I'm not quite sure where I'll be going with it.

So we found out just before Christmas that my mom has colon cancer. A specialist from Houston should be calling her within the next couple of days to schedule surgery, during which they'll remove 10 cm from her colon. It hasn't spread further, and that's a great thing! One sorta major complication is that (and sorry if I disgust you with the details...it's just how it is) her rectum is only 5 cm from where they'll be cutting, and they may not be able to save it. If that happens, basically she'll have to walk around with a bag the rest of her life. The doc said that technology is so far advanced that there is another option to the bag...but for now we're just praying that it'll all work out.

I'm sorry if I haven't responded to emails, etc...just been a bit preoccupied with this. I ask that if you're reading this that you pray for my mom and her health. I'll try to update it as much as possible and when I hear anything.

Personally...I'm just heartbroken that my mom has had to go through so much as it pertains to her health. She's been such a trooper through everything else...but I just want her to have a break. I do know, however, that God is in control. He's got the whole world in His hands, remember? Really, though, I know that He cares about her even more than I do (and that's a whole lot), and I just have to trust she's in His hands.

So the thing is...

...moving, new beginnings and life itself all just have a bunch of drama. I haven't blogged because of that...because I've been trying to make sense of it all and haven't been able to put it into words.

Back in September our family was faced with some heavy-duty drama that caused things to sorta stop for a bit. One of our family members was harmed, and the entire family was forced into a very difficult situation. We had to learn to forgive when we were deeply wounded. We had to learn what it meant to really forgive someone when it wasn't deserved. Yet, who are we to say who does or doesn't deserve forgiveness? And who are we to withhold forgiveness? I, we, have all been forgiven a great deal, and I believe God allows circumstances like these to force us to deal with ourselves. Where are we? Do we love as He does?

Honestly, I don't think I was personally dealing with the issue very well. At first, it was easy to respond with forgiveness because that's what I've been trained to do. My mind and my heart were automatically there. Then reality set it a bit more and so did time...and my heart began to harden. I began reacting instead of responding, and I wasn't the typical Susy. In a way, I think I was upset with God for allowing weird things to happen at the most inopportune times. However, I also knew deep in my heart that though it didn't seem like it at the time, He could and would bring something truly great out of trash. My growing process seems a bit slow right now, but He's patient. And I know He'll use this for good. He's causing all of us to grow from it. If it's just for me to learn a bit more how to love, then it's worth it. That's what He desires - to refine us.

So that was an attempt to explain three very long months.

On a lighter note, we've received more snow here than I've seen in my life. It started two or three weeks ago with some ice and then a couple of inches of snow. Nathan amused me and helped me with my first real snowman. Then last week, or earlier this week (my schedule is so messed up these days) we had a day of "blizzard-like conditions" for an entire afternoon which produced 8-10 inches of snow (they're still uncertain) and snow drifts up to 3 feet. I was working during the crazy snow storm and watched people attempt driving. At different times you couldn't see across the street and visibility was less than 1/8 of a mile. Why were people driving in it? I have no clue, but it was also incredibly cold, so cold that people's wipers were freezing. It didn't help that they could hardly see to begin with...I'd never seen anything like it. Thank goodness for my amazing husband who came to the rescue and picked me up from work. I've been driving the little piece of Kia, and it just wouldn't have been able to get through because the snow was so deep. Because Nathan loves adventure and actually enjoys driving in this mess, we went to dinner and a movie instead of straight home (where the sane people were). I was just mesmerized by how much snow there was EVERYWHERE. I've seen snow here and there, but never sooo much snow all over the place. Oh...well except when we went to Montana on our honeymoon. Anyway, I'll try to post pictures soon.

Yesterday we had some snow that didn't stick, but it was all okay because we still have plenty of it from the crazy blizzard-like day. Then last night we got another 5 inches. Okay, so I've been all gung-ho about snow because I come from Lake Jackson, Texas, the place that gets snow once every 15 years...and never like this. The part I really don't like about this is having to drive in it. Ugh. My amazing husband came to the rescue once again and followed me to work this morning. He really wants me to get adjusted to it and get comfortable enough to drive in it. Well, it's not so bad. It's just bad when there's people around. Other cars really stress me out, and I just pray, "Oh, Jesus, oh Jesus, oh Jesus..." He hears that.

Pics soon to come.

Peace on Earth

So as I was reading my Biblia the other day, I came upon a verse that caught my attention like never before. Psalm 34:14 says, “Depart from evil and do good; seek peace and pursue it.”

I've read this Psalm at least several dozen times, but never before has the second part of it hit me the way it did recently - seek peace and pursue it.

I then did a little more research and found a few other verses that speak of seeking after or pursuing peace:

Romans 14:19 – Therefore, let us pursue the things which make for peace and the things by which one may edify another.
Romans 12:18 – If it is possible, as much as depends on you(emphasis mine), live peaceably with all men.
Hebrews 12:14 – Pursue peace with all people and holiness, without which no one will see the Lord.
2 Tim. 2:22 – Flee also youthful lusts; but pursue righteousness, faith, love, peace with those who call on the Lord out of a pure heart

Because God has called us to pursue peace, I’m not only to desire peace with my fellow brother, but I am to seek it, pursue it, and do whatever is in my power to live at peace with all men.

Pursuing peace with all people – not sitting idly on a situation, but chasing reconciliation with all men (especially those with whom I have offense).

In the past if I had any ‘issues’ with people, a lot of the times I would just try to ignore the problem, hoping it would just go away. It never really worked, though. Even if it was years later, God always had a way of unfolding the situation and reminding me of Matthew 5:23-24 – “Therefore if you are presenting your offering at the altar, and there remember that your brother has something against you, leave your offering there before the altar and go; first be reconciled to your brother, and then come and present your offering.”

Simple right? For most people this may not be a challenge, but to Susy it used to be pretty difficult. Why? Well, simply put I can be very selfish and proud – the stems of most evil.

When I’ve been hurt in the past, it has often taken me a while to get over it. My pride allowed bitterness to creep in and steal the peace between myself and the other party. In some cases the other person wasn’t even aware that they had offended me. Then if I encountered that person, oh, I would just have this way of making things seem totally uncomfortable. Ever been on the receiving end of that? Or worse, have you been a Susy? It’s a terrible way to manipulate people and situations, and I’m certainly not proud that I have ever done this. I’m not saying that the hurts were imagined or that the offenses weren’t valid. Feelings, though fickle, are valid because they are ours. My feelings were valid, but I failed to confront situations the right way.

The better way -

do whatever is in your power to pursue peace by communicating the offense, choosing to forgive whether or not an apology is given, and giving way not to bitterness and resentment (which only hold us captive) but to love and peace.

I love them with my life and miss them with all my heart...

For Clarification

Blogging - I was asked recently why I blog. I don't know that there's just one simple answer. If you go out to the blogosphere, there are blogs out there for any and everything. What makes me think I have something worth saying?

1) This is my way of keeping friends and family tuned into my life without having to send individual emails. Lazy? Maybe. With so many people in so many places, I'm just not that great at responding to the same questions over and over in emails. My typing fingers get tired.

2) I get to vent here and talk about whatever I want without edits. What I mean is that I don't have anyone making the rules for me. I make the rules on my blog. These are my views and my opinions. I tell it how I'm feeling it at the moment. Especially when it comes to health, I try not to tell you how or what I think you should do. I type as I learn, so if I sound like I'm stuffing things down your throat, it's only because you caught me on a passionately-about-health (or something) day.

BURN THEM ALL!

I am outraged! I waited a week to post this to see if I could calm down, but I'm as outraged as ever. Last week I spent quite a bit of time at a bookstore. I was looking through 'health' books and couldn't believe what I was reading. These days, anyone can publish a book about health. Yes, you can promote and recommend the most ridiculous ideas about health and have the book published. You know how? Get the big corporations behind you, and you can do whatever you want.

Liars! They're all liars! They tell half-truths and end up deceiving people about why we are actually sick. One book I picked up said this, "...studies have found that saturated fats cause heart disease...etc..." Guys, that's a half-truth. I continued to read to see if he ever finished that statement with the rest of the story. The author never did. The fact is, and I say that clearly - the FACT is that not ALL saturated fats are bad. We need some saturated fats, and one of the reasons we are so sick today is because we lack those fats. Ugh!

Another author was trying to convince the reading audience about how animal products are making kids go into puberty at younger ages, and blah, blah, blah. That's all that was - blah, blah, blah. Why? It's a lie because it's a half-truth. The FACT is that the types of animal products we feed our children aren't just laced with hormones and antibiotics; they are DOUSED with them. Animal products are GOOD for us when they're fed correctly, raised correctly, and aren't injected with poisons. What?! Good for us? This, of course, goes against the 'oh-so-great' vegetarian diets that we think are 'oh-so-great' for us. I won't get into why I will never EVER be a vegetarian, and I hope that we can still be friends if you're reading this and ARE a vegetarian. These days, I understand why people think it's better to go all vegan. Our animal products are practically poisonous, so I would do the vegetarian thing if there was no way for me to get quality animal products. BUT there is a way, thank GOD.

Then I read a book recommending that we should put our kids on a low-fat diet and give them soy products. Are you for real? You may be thinking that we should ALL be on a low-fat diet, given what you may or may not know. The truth is that we NEED fat...the right kind of fat that is. And soy - oh I won't get started. I'll try to post soon what I've learned about the ever-popular soy.

I get so ticked off when losers give people half-truths in books because THAT'S what keeps feeding the big corporations. They (as well as the FDA, the politicians, and all those other people) make so much money from us ingesting their 'health' foods and adapting their 'health' recommendations - it makes me SICK!

Do you know what their 'studies' are like? Well, I can't get into it much right now, but just know that most of their 'studies' are inaccurate, and therefore, their findings are inaccurate. How are they allowed to publish their lies? Because it's all about money. If you have the right kind of people behind you, you can do whatever you want. And all that they want is to make a profit.

So instead of letting the fire-starter in me lose in the bookstore, I took several deep breaths and walked out before I did anything crazy. But I say we burn them all - burn all the crazy books with the crazy information that is only making more and more profit for the people who don't actually want you to be healthy.

Oh, and before placing your children on a low-fat or fat-free diet, PLEASE call me. In trying to help them, that is only going to kill them. What IS good to do: quit feeding them all those donuts, chicken nuggets, and processed foods. That's a good start.

Susy's Blog Rules, Numero Dos

2. I cannot post your comment if it contains vulgar language. I love your thoughts - especially yours, Mr. Scoundrel - but I want to maintain a family-friendly environment. Please keep the comments rated G.

Susy's Blog Rules, Numero 1

1. If leaving a comment, you MUST at least leave your name. Anonymity is a form of cowardice.

EDIT: I DO actually understand some forms of and reasons for anonymity. I may know who you are if you leave some initials, a nickname, or the like. I would like for you to leave your name, though, if I'll have no idea who you are. Thanks! View Blog

I'm Still in the Game to See Dorothy...

...but in the meantime, check out the footprints sasquatch left for us.




I took these a couple of nights ago after we had some rain. Okay and does it seem like we're all getting bombarded by it - the rain I mean? I won't complain, though. Thank GOD for it! This rain has kept the weather unusually cool for this time of the year. I hear that by now everything green is usually dying and that the temps are typically in the high 90s. Yes, we do reach high 90s and even the hundreds here. This great rain has kept us in the mid 80s for the most part, and I don't mind that at all. In fact, I've been praying for this kind of weather for my hubby. In his current line of work, they'll take rain with 80s temps any day over what should be. Anyway, the pictures - if you look closely, it's actually a double rainbow.

I Found OZ...

...actually, I only found Mr. Tin-man and Mr. Scarecrow. I think Dorothy, Toto, and the Lion were nearby hiding. See, they're not to be found by outsiders. Only Kansans have the high privilege of knowing where they live. I'm new into the database, so they're testing me. They're waiting to see if I give away their location. If I don't, I pass the test, and Dorothy, herself, along with Toto, will unveil themselves. If, however, I give anyone even an inkling as to their whereabouts, I fail the opportunity to be one of them - a Kansan. At this point, I'm still back and forth on the issue.

Spaghetti Squash

So we know that whole wheat grains are NOT the best choice. Unless they have been properly fermented, sprouted or treated, they have enzyme inhibitors which prevent us from breaking down the food and absorbing it. That causes us to get all kinds of intestinal diseases. Most whole grain products also have hydrogenated or partially hydrogenated oils. Those cause artery damage, which puts us at a very high risk for arteriosclerosis.

Well, I'm a big bread and pasta fan...as well as cheese (thus my love for pizza), but I don't want to continue to harm my lil' arteries. As far as breads and grains go, eat sprouted or be a super-hero like my friend, Chrystal, and mill your own wheat berries to make your own bread. (This, by the way, doesn't mean that all home-made bread is good for you. No, it requires a bit more than that.)

For pasta, well...there's sprouted pasta, but I had a really terrible time attempting to enjoy it. My preferred YUMMY alternative is SPAGHETTI SQUASH.

This is a tasty pasta alternative that allows tons of creativity. Let me know if when you try it out!

I'm Co-Co Nuts

All oils are not created equal. You probably know that by now because the word is finally getting out there. Trans fats are the enemy. They're formed when oils are hydrogenated or partially hydrogenated - heated at such high temps that the molecular structure is changed. The oils is more stable, but it's detrimental to the human body. They lower the good cholesterol and damage our arteries, leading to clogged arteries. Did you know that vegetable oils are somehow emulsified with water and given to organ-transplant patients to suppress their immune system? That's right - they suppress the immune system and skew the omega-6 to omega-3 ratio. These oils contribute to thyroid problems. So, a great thing to do is completely eliminate (or at least reduce) the intake of ALL vegetable oils (corn, safflower, sunflower, canola, sesame, MARGARINE, vegetable shortening, etc.).

Olive oil is a great alternative to these oils; HOWEVER, its drawback is that it is susceptible to damage when it is cooked. Some of the nutrition is less effective when heated. So I use olive oil on salads or...things.

When it comes to cooking, I've been using coconut oil for a little over a year now. Coconut oil is the ONLY oil that is not damaged by cooking at higher temperatures (it remains stable at high temps). Coconut oil is GOOD-FOR-YOU saturated fat. It helps prevent and sometimes even help cure some illnesses and diseases. Though it's a saturated fat, it actually helps weight loss because it raises the metabolic rate, causing us to burn more calories. From what I understand, fats are stored in the body's cells. Coconut oil fatty acids, however, are sent immediately to the liver where it is turned into energy.

Imagine an oil that is GOOD for you! Yep, coconut oil can help regulate blood sugar and can act as an anti-inflammatory. I've heard of people even applying it directly on their skin to help protect against free radicals.

I'm not a big fan of coconuts. In fact, I don't really care for them much at all. I wish I did because they are soooooo good for you. So when it came to cooking I was quite hesitant to use it. At first I could definitely taste it in my eggs or some of the veggies I lightly sauteed. Because I don't like coconut, it took getting used to tasting it in random food. I have now become accustomed to its taste and don't really mind it at all.

The important thing is to get a good quality brand of virgin coconut oil. I have researched and tried a couple of brands, so email me if you're interested.

Oh, if you're looking for it in the store, don't bet on wally-world. I have yet to find it there or Target. Health food stores carry it, but it's usually not in the oil section. I typically find it in the supplement isle of the health food stores. It's a white solid at room temperature that liquefies when heated.

complex carbs

So complex carbs - we need them, but how do we get them if we shouldn't eat the evil whole wheat bread? VEGETABLES guys. Recently I was having a conversation with a few people and one of them asked me how I get my complex carbs if I don't eat bread. I explained that I do eat sprouted bread, but my main source of complex carbs are vegetables. I was shocked because THEY were shocked that vegetables are complex carbs. A work-out guru had mis-informed these innocent people by telling them that the only way to get complex carbs was from whole wheat products. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?!

I was so stinkin' upset that I wanted to just shake these people and ask them why they believe such nonsense. I didn't, though. Instead, I allowed myself to realize that it's just pure ignorance. Ignorance doesn't mean stupidity; it means uninformed. It means that some loser took advantage of people's lack of knowledge and poisoned them with his lack of knowledge. When it comes to health, bad information plus lack of knowledge can equal heart attacks.

Here's a very short article on grains and the like that is very easy to read and will shed a little more light on the whole grain issue. It's from a completely reliable source, Dr. Mercola. Sure, he's extreme on a lot of things, but that is only because he understands the implications of our modern-day diets.

here fishy-fishy

So I finally had my first positive experience fishing not that long ago. Nathan was going to take a picture of me from his boat, but I got paranoid and could only envision my lovely camera becoming the property of the fish. So I held on to it on the shore of the pond while Nathan and Dad fished from the boat. I didn't really want to show them up by catching all the fish.

stinkin' inet issues

so whenever it rains in the country, the inet goes down. since it was raining for about 4 days straight here, the inet went out of whack for a while. that's such a frustrating thing for me because i was really gaining momentum in my blogging. one more time...

whole wheat = evil wheat

WHEAT IS BAD. that's right - it's bad. you hear people talk about whole grains and whole wheat and blah, blah, blah. that's all it is - BLAH! so the whole wheat bread, pasta, cereaks, waffles, crackers, etc that we eat are BAD. you are not getting nutrition from these...well, maybe a tiny little bit, BUT your body probably isn't able to absorb it anyway. i'm going to do my best to explain how it works, AND i'll also tell you what IS good for you. there ARE breads and pastas that are actually good for you. and by the way...there are VEGETABLES that ARE COMPLEX CARBS. guys, VEGETABLES ARE LIFE! they're the best source of carbs and COMPLEX CARBS at that. (more on complex carbs later.)

again, i'll do my best to put this in simple english, but i may not be able to do it in a short blog. so i'm going to list the basics first, and then to go deeper, just continue reading.

before wheat is even planted, they receive fungicides and insecticides - CHEMICALS to kill pests. the fda as approved these as 'safe,' but they are NOT. you wouldn't want to take a spoonful of the stuff and eat it, but that's what they do to the wheat seeds. did you know that some of these chemicals are hormones? yes, ESTROGEN-like chemicals that cause our hormones to go CRAZY! these are the chemicals that are making our little boys and girls go into puberty at really young ages. these are also chemicals that contribute to hormone-related cancers.

next - wheat is usually stored for a long period of time, which makes it vulnerable to insects and the like. so not only are the wheat 'storage bins' sprayed with chemicals all over, but most of the time, the wheat itself is put IN the chemicals!

the wheat is then heated at very high temperatures by artificial drying methodsjavascript:void(0)
Publish Post. this causes damage to the protein, RUINING ITS NUTRITIONAL VALUE

here comes the crazier damage, but it takes a bit of explanation, i hope you're in for the long haul. a grain kernel consists of 3 main parts, and the nutrient density is only in existence when these 3 parts are intact. the way that flour is processed and produced in our century basically doesn't keep these together.

in fact the way that flour was made before we went and got in a hurry was completely different. i won't go into it, but because of the nutrients in it (vitamins, minerals, fiber), the flour spoiled quickly (like milk). so just like milk processing, we've done the same with wheat processing - we've sped up the processes (to make more money), have added preservatives (to make even more money), and in turn all of this makes us sick (making them even more money).

so the processing now means that we get some of the grain, and the other parts of it go to feed animals. that means that because it's not intact, we don't get nutrition from it and neither do the animals that eat it.

our ancestors, without knowing why, had a step in making flour that we skip today. this step is crucial because it is the way to benefit from eating a grain or anything made from a grain. before our 'genius' mass manufacturing processes came to be, people soaked their grains overnight (like we would do if making beans from scratch today) and allowed them to dry in open air until they germinated (or partially germinated). that is sprouting. this process is important because it removes PHYTATES from the grains. it's CRUCIAL to remove PHYTATES because they are enzyme inhibitors.

a quick lesson on enzymes - enzymes help break food down so that we can absorb it. if i eat a piece of 'healthy-for-you' whole wheat bread that has phytates (phytic acid), it blocks the enzymes. that means that my body cannot absorb whatever i am eating. so these enzymes that we need to break everything down so that we can absorb nutrients are being blocked by phytic acid, which is in ALL CEREALS, BREADS, PASTAS AND any other type of grain that hasn't been sprouted.

that's one of the reasons that eating 'good' things such as BRAN, WHOLE WHEAT BREAD, and unsprouted grains is a primary cause of intestinal diseases.

a little more on enzymes - cooking, processing, pasteurization and prolonged heat kill them.

wanna have diseases, especially intestinal ones? drink pasteurized milk, cook all of your food, and eat processed foods. oh wait! that's the american diet. moving on...

sprouting not only permits the enzymes to do their job (so that we don't die with lbs upon lbs of waste like john wayne), but it also [naturally] produces and increases the content of different vitamins.

sprouting also inactivates different carcinogens present in grains.

did you know that vitamin E (of which most of us are deficient) used to be present in the real whole wheat bread? that is now depleted because of the high heat of the processing mills.

if all of that still doesn't convince you that processed 'whole wheat' isn't what it's cracked up to be, maybe this will help - most whole wheat bread out there has hydrogenated or partially hydrogenated oil, one of the main causes of arteriosclerosis.

so WHAT TO DO????? well, you can be a super-hero like my friend, chrystal, and buy your own mill and wheat berries (organic ones) to make your own REAL homemade bread. THAT'S healthy stuff...and it's YUMMY!

...or if you're not yet a super-hero, you can do like susy: go to the frozen food section of the local health food store and pick up SPROUTED BREAD. i have found a couple of different brands, but i don't know that i have a favorite yet. i'll admit that at first, i wasn't crazy about it. however, i don't just tolerate it anymore; i actually do enjoy it now.

from a proud health nut - an ode to you

I guess I'll start by using more correct grammar and spelling in my blogs, which means I'll try to caps the words that should be...it just became one of my 'signature' moves - when emailing personally to friends and family or blogging, I just stayed away from grammar and all of that because I felt trapped. All parts of my life at one point or the other have required me to have 'perfect' English, and to be honest, I just wanted a break. So to be a bit more PC, I'm trying this out for a lil' bit. I don't know how long it will last.

The real purpose of today's blog is to give kudos to all the people I know who are doing even just 1 thing to improve their health. This health stuff can go way deep. Your choices and my choices are probably very different when it comes to what we eat, but that's okay. I'm so glad to know that we are beginning to be concerned with the foods we eat. Again, our choices may be very different still, but you are doing SOMETHING, and I'M SO PROUD OF YOU! Something is better than nothing, so give yourself a pat on the back. Continue to learn, but try to not get overwhelmed by all that is out there. I've been learning this stuff hard-core for the past couple of years, and I'm barely hitting the surface so hang in there.

crazyness

what a day! i mean that. sometime just before noon or around that time today, i received a call from my MIL. she was with the FIL on the way to see the oldest BIL and SIL who live in wichita (about a 15 minute drive). apparently some losers decided to break into their house. my sister in law was alone with the 6-month old baby. the losers held her up at gun-point and locked them in a closet while they ransacked the house. they stole a few valuables and then her sports car. thank GOD a neighbor from across the street called the police when she noticed something suspicious (the losers going into the house). the losers were only a few blocks away when the police caught up with them. they ran into a pole (totaling the car), the police ran into the car as well, but the losers still managed to get away on foot.

UGHHHHHHH! it's so frustrating - no, not the fact that the cops didn't catch up with them (cops get trashed enough. give 'em a break); but i'm ticked off at losers. i'm once again faced with and saddened by the fact that we live in a society in which cowardly, lawless losers can break into someone's home and may get away with it. the thing is that it's not going to get any better. that's right. we think that just because of advancement in technology or whatever else we think we've advanced, that life will somehow get better. i'm not a 'this-world-is-coming-to-and-end-we're-all-doomed-to-die' person, but that is in fact going to happen one day. things, life, people's morals, values, and behaviors are just going to get progressively worse. peace on earth is not going to happen until it gets really bad. that's just how it is. it's sad, but it's true.

so what do we do in the meantime? we pray just to make it today. i know, i know, lame-o. really, though...we must do what we have been called to do. we must live unto Him who gave us life. we must not forget that those who are His are in His care and in His hand. we must tell those who don't know Him about His great compassion, mercy, forgiveness, and love. and we must be this love...in spite of and because of 'losers.'

I Can't Believe it's Not Butter - I Can't Believe We Haven't BANNED it!

the number 1 killer today is heart disease. it's not drunk driving or even cancer. it's heart disease, and probably 99.9% of us help this killer every single day by the food we ingest.

people are always talking about cholesterol, right? the drug companies love it! yep, they get super filthy rich by telling us we need to lower our cholesterol. cholesterol is NOT the cause of heart disease. a high cholesterol count is not the problem. the problem is when the cholesterol attaches itself to the arteries. that's when blood flow is restricted. cholesterol only attaches itself to damaged arteries. if an artery isn't damaged, cholesterol can flow right through our blood without problems, and we don't get arteriosclerosis.

arteries are damaged primarily by 3 things:
1. chlorinated water - the stuff we drink, shower and swim in
2. hydrogenated oils or trans fats - this stuff is probably in 90% of the processed foods at the store...also called partially hydrogenated oil -it's all the same
3. homogenized dairy products - the fat in milk, cheese, yogurt, etc. is not the problem; it's the homogenization process (i'll post on this process another day)

almost all of us partake of this stuff every day. even if you eat a salad for lunch, the dressing most likely has partially hydrogenated oil in it. the 'good-for-you-whole-wheat bread' most likely has hydrogenated oil in it too. so does the infamous 'i can't believe it's not butter' product.

the milk you had with your cereal - pasteurized and homogenized. the water we brush our teeth with, make tea with, wash vegetables with - all chlorinated.

is there a way to avoid this? that's up to you. i'm pretty much finished with most of that stuff myself because i've read so much on it that it makes me sick thinking of the fda, the pharmaceutical industry, and even the politicians making money off of our diseases. it's all a scam...but anyway...because i've done so much research, i am convicted about what i allow in my body.

practically speaking, what can the average susy do? there IS a way to completely cut out hydrogenated oils. read the labels and don't buy the stuff. same with the dairy - i hardly ingest the stuff anymore. it's a change in lifestyle, but there are alternatives.

about the water - well, that just takes more work. to be honest, i can get so caught up in this all-organic-tree-hugger life that i forget to enjoy the life God gave me. so i take it one step at a time. if i can get a shower filter, yay. if i can swim in a lake or river rather than a chlorinated swimming pool, yay. if not, i don't let it ruin my day.

cute-ness

today our nephew is 6 months old, and i just want you to know how cute he is...

with mommy and daddy


with uncle nathan


playing superman with grandma

the locks are gone

a busy week last week was. i headed down to dallas on wednesday for a concert that i'd planned with some friends a few months back. the event was on friday, but i spend wednesday and thursday catching up with old pals. i didn't get to see everyone that i had wanted to see, but i realize that it's just impossible to try to do that in a couple of days. next time.

i also did something that i have wanted to do for a while - i cut my hair off to donate it to locks of love. now, i'm not telling you this so that you can say things like, "oh you're so great, blah blah..." i was a bit shocked when i started getting that reaction from people. the reason i'm doing this is not to get brownie points but to try and do my part to help lil' kiddos whose disease-stricken body has cause them to lose their hair - locks of love. locks of love is a public non-profit organization that provides hairpieces to financially disadvantaged children under age 18 suffering from long-term medical hair loss from any diagnosis. i didn't want to tell too many people why i was cutting my hair, but i really think it's important to make you and others aware of this organization. i figure that God gives us gifts, abilities, $$, and even hair for a reason. He gave me this big head of really thick hair that happens to grow pretty quickly, so why not give it away?

so amra, my new hairstylist, cut about 12 inches:


then she cut, cut, cut, cut some more, and thinned out like crazy. my head is so much lighter. i took this immediately after the cut (thus being in the car) so i could show you:


a before picture will be here soon.

Please Pray for Anya

Friends, it's with a sober and burdened heart that I write this today. I just learned over the weekend that my friend's little 3.5 yr. old daughter, Anya, was diagnosed with Acute Lymphoblastic Leukemia. Please take a moment to pray for this precious little girl. It's so hard to understand why certain things happen to certain people, BUT I'm glad that Anya's parents' hope is in God first and foremost. In spite of the questions they may have, they know for certain that our Father God loves Anya more than even they do, and they know that she is in His hands. I know the family would appreciate your prayers.

horsey manure

horse manure - that's what i played with earlier today. you know, it's an excellent source of...organic fertilizer.

this morning my MIL informed me that she was going to plant some vegetables. in the past she has typically grown a garden but just didn't make room for one this year. well, susy came along and kinda interrupted those plans. she doesn't want me to spend the money on the organic food at the store, so we're going to grow our own. well, i've wanted to do that for a long time; i just never knew quite where to begin. unfortunately, i didn't inherit my mother's green thumb, and i wasn't sure quite where to plant stuff out here. leave it to the the green queen (aka, the MIL) to find a place. her flower gardens are all on 'virgin' soil, so she said it'd be a great place for the vegetables. so we planted some zucchini, squash, and different kinds of peppers in the same area as the flowers. next year, we can designate a spot for just vegetables and do even more. for now, this will do. spring is planting season, but i think these will do just fine even though it's already summer.

so to the manure - well, because i'm 'freak-o' about fertilizers and all the crazy chemicals in the foods we eat, i'm going back to all organic. believe me - if you knew what i know, you would do it too. but anyway, the MIL said where she'd used horse manure (no, not straight from the horse), the plants, flowers, trees, etc. did much better. well, wouldn't you know it?! Father God intended for mother nature to take care of itself...and she does. there were areas that she still wanted to fill with the manure, so off we go to fill the gator with the manure.

yes, there i was on a mountain of horse manure, shoveling it into the gator. who ever would have thought that i could enjoy myself so much with a shovel and some horse dung?! you should try it sometime.

here we are on the gator


this is one of the zucchini plants

thousand-leggers

if you know me well, you know that i don't like bugs. i guess most people don't. okay, so not liking bugs is an understatement; i detest bugs. i used to have these recurring nightmares of giant mechanical roaches and spiders coming after me. no joke! thank GOD i haven't had one of those in a while, but of course, that...dislike just doesn't go all that well in the country, where i'm constantly discovering species of creatures i've never seen.

one of those creatures is the thousand-legger, aka the millipede. maybe i saw one when i was younger. i mean, living in mexico and traveling to small villages i'm sure had its bug-seeing moments. never, as long as i can remember, have i laid eyes on such a yucky, yet almost pretty creature. during our excursion to alma, i came upon such a creature - the thousand-legger. i have this instinct that i haven't been able to control - a screaming instinct when i come across a yucky bug that's out to get me. well, that's what i did when i saw the thousand-legger in the sink as i was about to wash my hands. the MIL, now knowing the meaning of my cries for help, came to my rescue, but to no avail. she quickly escorted me out of the bathroom while yelling, "mom!!!" immediately grandma elsie ran in to see what the fuss was about. without hesitation, she just ran water on it, and down the sink mr. thousand-legger went.

unfortunately, i was a bit too startled to go for the camera so that you could understand my consternation with mr. thousand-legger, but here are some pictures that might help. oh, but just so you know, the actual mr. thousand-legger was about 3.5 inches long, and with his leg span he was about 1.5 inches wide.

these are almost his very colors, but he had more legs


his legs numbered about this many...but they were much longer


and this...well, it just goes to show why i don't prefer them


p.s. i didn't use that bathroom sink the remainder of the time we were in alma :)

green acres?

i've heard about green acres - the show that is, but i've yet to watch an episode. i do know a bit of the music for some reason, though...anyway, if you want to see some real green acres, you've got to see this

this is the view from the front porch when i wake up in the morning



these are the real green acres.


now i understand now why people write westerns. so much can take place in just one day out in the country. the adventures never stop, and there's just so much to see and experience. i don't know that i'd actually ever read a western, but i can completely understand the purpose...of some.

alma, ks

so alma, kansas - that's where we went for a couple of days last week - grandma elsie, the mil, aunt karen, and i made some great memories there. after meeting up with karen, we went to the only restaurant in that town of under 800 people. it didn't seem like even that many people lived there. i think they have a stop sign, but that's about it. the four of us drove to 3 different cemeteries to find relatives' gravesites.



along the way, we stopped at a couple of the school houses where grandma elsie used to teach



some scenery


we went to the creek (but it's pronounced 'crick' in kansas) where grandma elsie skipped rocks.



we spent the remainder of the weekend mostly going through great-grandma thowe's (pronounced toe-bee)...stuff - letters, hand-sewn clothes...and stuff. we even played dress-up.



there's so much more to be said of the weekend, but it's hard to put into words. i'm so thankful that i've had the opportunity to be a part of that if just for a little while. i can't imagine what life would've been like without the commodities of electricity, running water, air conditioning and the like. people lived simple yet enjoyable lives without all the stress and chaos we have today. i'm beginning to experience and love that.

so this was a couple of weeks ago when nathan & i went cherry-pickin' and turkey-chasin'




then with the horsies

country bumpkin

i wrote this on wednesday:

This has been another great week so far. Yesterday I went into town (I actually have to use that term now – going into town) to take care of some errands. After the errands,
I stopped at a little bookstore where they actually buy and sell used books. I could’ve spent hours there just looking through some of them, but I was good and left with only one book. It was a $2 book at that, so I couldn’t pass it up. I’m looking forward to maybe making this a weekly visit to the little place.

When I was finally out of there I did it – I went to the driver’s license office and became an official Kansan by getting my Kansas driver’s license. The temporary license issued is so much better than the Texas temporary licenses because you actually get to see your picture right then and there. If it’s not a good one, you can ask to re-take it. The lady didn’t actually ask me if I liked mine like she did other people…but I’m sure it’s because…it was okay??? Who knows, but anyway, that’s points for Kansas.

Today was great because I made my way to Green Acres, a Whole Foods-type store where they actually sell organic food. I was so excited to be there that I ended up spending over 2 hours there. Those stores are like home to me – love it. Green Acres is smaller than Whole Foods, but it’s just as great.

Tomorrow I’m heading to Alma, Kansas with the MIL and Grandma Elsie. What’s in Alma? Well, none other than Grandma Toby’s (sp?) house. Grandma Toby is the MIL’s grandma. The MIL’s sister will also meet us there, and we’re sure to have a wonderful girl time. I hear it’s a neat old house with lots and lots of memories. We’ll come back on Saturday morning in time for me to see hubster.

The MIL wants to jump on the health wagon with me, so after we return from our trip this weekend, we’re jumping in this together. I’ll finally get back to my better eating habits and get back on track. I’m also scouting out some other health food stores and local co-ops. We’re also talking about our own organic garden next year…hmmm…

hickety cricket

so what is life like for me now that i'm living in the sunflower state? well, my first week was pretty uneventful:

monday - memorial day was great because it meant nathan would be home for even one more day
tuesday - unpacking, started teaching the non-A.D.D. black lab how to "play dead"
this is him during one of his resting moments:

wednesday - unpacking; this is the day i found a tick on my head after running around outside with the dogs; this is also the day a black, furry spider crawled out of a curtain as i vacuumed; this is ALSO the day a spider was crawling on my leg as i walked inside from petting the cats; continued the "play dead" teaching process
thursday - the BIL drove around the area with me so that i could figure my way around the wichita, towanda, andover, etc. area; continued the "play dead" teaching process
friday - spent time checking emails, etc.; read; was on the inet for a few hours in the evening; hubby came home!

on sunday afternoon nathan went fishing while i spent some time finishing up a book. he then picked me up and wen went on a gator ride. the gator is this 4-wheel drive, 2 passenger lil vehicle that they use here to go from one place to the next. we drove into an 'wooded' area, picked berries and ate them! we also chased a turkey, but he was one turn ahead of us even on the gator.

that evening nathan's older brother and his wife came over with their 5 month-old baby boy. he's one of the most adorable little babies ever.

i've never known so much peace and relaxation. i'm taking it all in and enjoying every moment of it.

pictures coming soon!

the move...

...was almost uneventful. it all began on friday, may 25 at 3:22 a.m. i woke up and after fueling and purchasing the largest coffee available, i drove from lake jackson to dallas to attempt a finish at the packing before my mom and her husband, louis, made it to my apartment later that morning. i made it to dallas shortly after 8 and hurriedly took down the shower curtain and continued the packing.

now understand that my mom had called me the prior week to let me know not to rent a u-haul because louis had a trailer that they believed would fit all of our stuff. now i had never seen this trailer, but they were convinced that with tarps everything would be fine even in the rain.

well, wouldn't you know it?? it rained on and off on friday as we were loading and even driving. nathan wasn't able to get off work to help, but i reassured him that i had the help of some trusty friends. without their help, we wouldn't have been able to get it done. so after 6 or 7 hours of loading and all that fun stuff, we finally pulled away from dallas...still in the rain.



we made it to my aunt's house in northwest oklahoma sometime after midnight. just before going to bed at 2 a.m., i walked out with my uncle to get a couple of things from my jeep. he noticed that my mom had left her inside light on. we noticed that when he went back outside to turn it off, it took him quite a while. when he finally came back in, it turned out that there had almost been a fire in my mom's vehicle. we had stuffed some of the sofa cushions in the back, and one of them had turned on the back, inside light on without her knowledge. it stayed on the entire time that we drove from dallas to fairview, ok. it burned a whole in our sofa cushion, but THANK GOD that was all. things could've been worse.

we finally made it to kansas around 7 on saturday, may 26. i can't begin to say how amazing it was to see my husband after not having seen him for over 8 weeks.

we're settling in now, and i'll have more time to blog about the great kansas adventures...i'm already a country girl...almost...

special thanks go to those who were there helping pack and also load. i can't tell you how much i appreciate you!!!

i miss my friends and fam like crazy, but i'm at peace knowing we're in God's will.

...more to come...

leaving on a...trailer

As some of you may or may not know, Nathan & I are moving to Kansas. We've known for a while that at some point we would probably be moving there, but we just never knew the timing. "'The time has come,' the walrus said..."

I turned in my notice at work about 3 weeks ago to give my boss enough time to find someone I could begin training. Within a week, I was already training, and the transition process there has gone very well. My last day at work will be May 18, after which I will go to the enchanted city of Lake Jackson to visit friends and family for a week. On Memorial Day weekend, some of my family will then help me drive our belongings to the land of Kansas to join Nathan, who has been there for a little while already.

I've been asked over and over how I feel about this move, etc. etc. I AM SUPER EXCITED! A year ago I didn't think I'd ever say that. If you know me semi-well, you know that I'm a city girl. I love the movement, the energy, the people, and sometimes even the traffic. I've come to a point, though, of a complete change of heart. Although I may always be a city girl, I'm looking forward to a change of pace.

what david hasselhoff & i have in common...and deodorant

so i'm gonna let you in on a little secret so that you won't be embarrassed for me next time you see me sweat. I DON'T WEAR DEODORANT! that's right. i tossed the stuff away. well, okay that's not entirely true. more accurately, i don't wear antiperspirant. i could go into a long blog about the terrible effects of antiperspirant, but i'm not the best at explaining it, so i'll direct you to a website where you can educate yourself on it. read this and watch the video:

still wearing antiperspirant?

it seems that hollywood is slowly catching some of the hippie vibe as well. it's true, from justin timberlake (not pictured) to even nicole kidman and naomi cambpell, the 'stars' are beginning to get the picture as well and have banned the poison of antiperspirant and most deodorants.









so when you see me sweat the small stuff, don't sweat it for me. i'm perfectly comfortable with my decision and hope that you, too, can take one more step to rid your body of poisonous toxins. deodorant is the devil. okay, so myabe not, but you get my point.

silly people=silly comments, round 2

so my husband can be a pretty funny guy. he's also very simple. it's a nice little balance that it brings to my life. the problem with the simplicity comes when we're ordering coffee at one of our now rare visits to starbucks (the high priced addiction problem is for another blog). my drink usually consists of something nonfat with an extra shot of this and pump of that. really, it's no big deal to me, BUT nathan refuses to order for me if i get (in his terms) complicated. so in fun the other day, he posts this picture comment on my myspace page.



i cracked up because i know how much i actually amuse him. so i was glad to see him amused rather than annoyed by my ordering habits. well, then i get an email from a subject we'll call felix. felix writes me, "...you really should watch the stuff you put on your page. people may think you actually drink and even have problems with pills and things. it could really ruin your reputation...i don't know that i can associate myself with you if you're going be putting up comments like this..."

yes, silly people equals silly comments. if felix actually had any clue about who i am, who my husband is and what we're about, he wouldn't have reason to make this comment. felix has no clue what that was about. now, i do agree that we should watch what we do and say and write because we affect people. our decisions affect those around us. the thing is that felix is so concerned about others' opinions and feels condemned about who knows what, that felix has the need to interfere with things of which he's completely uninformed.

my issue with it was this: let's say i'm actually an alcoholic, and let's say i have pill-popping problems - would felix have cared about that at all? would felix try to come to my rescue? i don't know. felix is too concerned with not getting dirty, that he forgets what he's called to do - love. if i had pill and alcohol problems, that's what i would need more than anything.

we get so caught up in looking 'pure' and clean and perfect that we forget that when Jesus came, He hung out with the people who weren't looking the best. in fact, He hung out with the messed up people.

there was this prostitute woman that was about to be stoned to death. Jesus rescued her. yes, He rescued the dirty, filthy, sinning woman.

we're put on this earth to love and rescue people. we're to pursue each other when we can and love each other like crazy, like there's no tomorrow.

i've been a self-righteous hypocrite before. i've looked at people in their wretchedness and thought i was so much better just because, "...at least i'm not doing what they're doing...at least i'm better off..." that's the selfish attitude that Jesus spurned.

i hope that i can soon love enough to quit the ridiculous judgments that hold me captive to hellish thinking. i hope that i can love you like crazy.