Yesterday was a good day. Last weekend wasn't the greatest for my mom, but the past couple of days have been better. THANK GOD! My mom is in fact experiencing side effects from the treatments, but they could be worse, and for that we're all so very thankful.
It never ceases to amaze me how incredible my mother is. We were at the hospital yesterday (since she has daily treatments, we're there at least once a day), and there was a girl probably about my age or a bit younger. We had seen her earlier in a different area with a lady who appeared to be her mom, but the girl was alone this time. We were sitting in the radiation waiting area...the girl was sitting facing us a few chairs down. All of a sudden she gets up, throws her magazine and phone on the floor, and jets to the bathroom to vomit. I felt awful that her mom wasn't there and just wanted to go hug her, but it was a single person bathroom AND I didn't know how she would take it. I mean, some people like to deal with things on their own and don't want other people, especially srangers, to interfere. Of course, my mom's heart really went out to her as well, so she just got up, knocked on the bathroom door, and just helped the girl.
I was so relieved when my mom did that. I know if I was going through something like that and didn't have my mom with me...I don't know what I would do actually. *sigh* It turns out this young lady's treatments began one day before my mom's, but the side effects are really getting to her. The reason her mom wasn't around was because she went to the pharmacy to pick up some nausea medicine.
I don't do well at the hospital. I try to be normal and not let it show, but my heart just breaks because every single day I see these people who are walking through some pretty horrific ordeals. Every single day that they wake up, they have to face this terrible disease and wonder what reactions from the disease or treatments their bodies will have to deal with...either this day, this hour, or this moment. They are very brave people.
My mom is a very brave woman. I hear her thank God throughout the day because she knows her symptoms from chemo and radiation could be worse. God has been good to us. Yes, she's dealing with some physical side effects (nausea, diarrhea, headaches, weird appetite or none at all, light-headedness, etc.), but she says that things could be worse, and she praises God for his grace to endure whatever comes her way.
When I saw some of the cancer patients at the hospital yesterday, I really started praying that my mom wouldn't get this or that or the other. Is that selfish? I felt very selfish, but I just don't want her body to experience all of that.
As we sat down to eat dinner last night, my mom prayed, "Thank you, Lord, for another good day. Thank you that my body is still doing so well, but please help ____ and ____ who aren't. Help those people who aren't..."
It's a reminder to me not only to pray for my mom, but also for the other people around who aren't doing the best. She also reminds me not to forget to thank Him for His goodness. Yes, He has been good, and is good, and He will give us all the grace to endure what may be.
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