Today was kind of a bad day for my mom. She woke up with such little energy that little things, like blow-drying her hair, were draining. It's fun playing hair, but I don't necessarily care for the circumstances.
We made it to the hospital an hour after my mom's first appointments were supposed to begin, but it was just a slow morning. Fortunately, the doctors, nurses, and staff at MD Anderson are incredible, patient, and understanding. They just took us in a bit later. I'm such a freak about promptness and all that, but it's so nice to know that the people here are so understanding about the circumstances.
The doctor let us know that my mom's condition is normal. The side effects are just kicking in more as they had expected they would. They said the awful cramping could be caused by a couple of things. Basically, things are as they should be, and they just encouraged my mom to "hang in there." They know it's easier said than done, so they're careful to listen to everything we have to say and answer all of our questions.
In humor, my mom asked the doctor if she could kinda just take a permanent break from the treatments. Of course, he said no. The treatment has to run its FULL COURSE for it to achieve the desired results. And what are those results? To shrink the tumor and stop any kind of spreading of the cancer. These experienced professionals are giving her the 'dosage' the tumor needs and that her body can handle. I say that knowing that her body is frail, and they know that as well. They know her body will take a 'beating,' but they're monitoring all of it carefully.
I say all of that because I was 'reprimanded' at one point for not asking the doctors to decrease her dosage and for not getting enough information as to the progress. Um, the thing is - we've asked them all of those questions. They continue to let us know that, again, this has to run its FULL COURSE. Believe me, I would love more than anything to stop all of it right now, but I can't do that. People (not doctors I might add) have also recommended all kinds of treatments to my mom and how this can do that and whatnot. You know what? Those may or may not work. What we're doing now is the same. HOWEVER, this is the course of action chosen, and my mom is trusting that God will guide her and help her through each and every step. I know people mean well, but I guess I'm sharing this just so that all know kinda where we are.
Touchy, huh? Sorry...weird phone calls.
Okay, so back to today - as we were leaving the hospital, my mom suddenly hunched over in pain from stomach cramps. A kind nurse (on her lunch break) quickly came to us, helped get my mom to a chair, and went out of her way to get a wheelchair. How does one stay strong in a time like that? Well, again, the cramps are somewhat normal. Specifically the doc said it could be from too much imodium or a reaction of something she was eating...combined with the chemo and radiation. The pain subsided and was even gone within 5 or 10 minutes - thank you, God. My mom was able to eat a little (the menu choices for her are dwindling quickly), and then she napped for about 2.5 hrs. This evening she felt a bit better, but she on and off just feels yuck. That's the only way I know to describe it right now.
So please pray that this cramping nonsense will stop. The other stuff is bad enough. This added to it is just not ...good. Oh, my mom has last 2.2 lbs this past week, so pray that she'll be able to eat a little better to maintain her weight and her potassium (they've put her on potassium so that she doesn't have to worry about even coming close to being low).
I mentioned yesterday that she had 9 treatments left, but we were a day off. She had 10 left, and as of TODAY she has 9.
I've been singing the first verse of this song over and over, meditating on it and making it mine. It's my comfort when things look so wrong...
Be still, my soul: the Lord is on your side.
Bear patiently the cross of grief or pain.
Leave to thy God to order and provide;
In every change, He faithful will remain.
Be still, my soul: thy best, thy heavenly Friend
Through thorny ways leads to a joyful end.
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